


A Pear of Fools

by catboxjellyfish



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: ChanSoo - Freeform, M/M, Takostation 2016, awkward thigh fuck for life, grocery AU, just the boys being stupid, mmm my ding ding dong, ohh you touch my tralala, the worst food puns you will ever hear in your whole life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-19 04:19:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8189641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catboxjellyfish/pseuds/catboxjellyfish
Summary: TakoStation Submission 2016 [ chansoo / side baekchen / grocery store au / R / 6,630 words ]  Because baggers cannot be juicers, or so the joke goes, and that is how Kyungsoo started working at EXO Mart as a cashier. But how the hell did he end up pantsless inside the back freezer with the handsome deli boy? They say stupidity is contagious and Kyungsoo wholeheartedly agrees. In the end, they are just a pear of fools.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [takostation](https://archiveofourown.org/users/takostation/gifts).



“Well, welcome to the team, Kyungsoo!”

The said boy smiles coyly and bows at his new employer. Kim Junmyeon smiles in return and quickly scans his new cashier from head to toe again. This one seems normal, he prays; he already has enough weird employees in his little supermarket.

Start your own business it’ll be fun, they said. Run a supermarket it’s not that hard, they said. Junmyeon mentally rolls his eyes for the millionth time and curses: Bullshit! He should never have listened to those people and opened an internet cafe instead. But it’s all too late for that, he sighs. Now he is responsible for a handful of punks and their livelihoods.

_Ding dong ding dong~_

The in-store announcement chimes above their heads and both Kyungsoo and Junmyeon look up aimlessly at the tall ceiling lined with fluorescent lights.

“Good morning shoppers, welcome to EXO Mart,” a deep and mirthful voice sounds from the speakers, “We take great interest in the wellbeing of your physical and mental health because we are a supermarket that cares, so here is your joke of the day.”

Junmyeon narrows his eyes and Kyungsoo cocks an amused brow.

“A new juicer is installed in a small grocery store and everyone wants to be the one running it, including the eager grocery bagger. He begged the owner of the store to please let him have the juicer position but the owner turned him down definitively. When the grocery bagger asked why, the owner replied,” the cheerful announcer clears his throat and alters his voice a bit, “Well son, that is because everyone knows that baggers can’t be juicers!”

Immediately, a fit of obnoxious guffaw explodes over the speakers and it echoes through the entire store. In the background, a muffled giggle could also be heard, as well as someone saying ‘laaaaaaameee’ with the syllables dragged out. Some shoppers let out a dry chuckle but most of them ignore the ruckus. Obviously, they are already used to all the shenanigan that goes down in EXO Mart.

Junmyeon’s eyelid twitches dangerously and a low growl rumbles in his throat. Kyungsoo lowers his head and he involuntarily shudders from the corny joke. Then an ear-splitting howl sounds from beside him and causes the poor boy to jitter with shock.

“PARK. CHAN. YEOL!” Junmyeon hollers and storms off. Blinking at the owner’s furious figure which quickly disappears around the corner, Kyungsoo wonders if he has made the right decision to work at this supermarket.  

Just then, the noise of something crashing and somebody screaming replaces the previous merriment over the speakers. Seconds later, the nonsense announcement is cut short completely by a piercing feedback from the sound system.

Deadpan, Kyungsoo plugs his ears with his fingers.

He definitely did not make the right decision.

\---

“Oh ho, you must be the new guy Junmyeon hyung hired!”

Kyungsoo pauses from reading the EXO Mart safety handbook and looks up. A tall boy with bright red hair and a toothy grin is towering over him. Kyungsoo recognizes his voice: it's the troublemaker on the announcement from yesterday. ‘What was his name again?’ He wonders but nods curtly meanwhile in acknowledgment.

“I'm Park Chanyeol,” the red hair giant answers as if having read Kyungsoo mind, “What’s your name?”

Kyungsoo observes the grinning boy in front of him more carefully before replying flatly: “Doh Kyungsoo.”

Wide eyes that always look slightly shocked lock with mirthful and mischievous orbs, and both boys take a moment to assess each other. Compact and petite meets large and lanky; he stares intensely while he smiles wider. In an instant, Chanyeol decides that he likes Kyungsoo because the new boy looks super cute, just his type. In that same instance, Kyungsoo also decides that he doesn’t like Chanyeol very much because the red hair boy is too tall.

“How old are you, Kyungsoo? I’m 18.”

“17.”

“Hey, we’re close in age! I work in the deli, you?”

“Check out,” Kyungsoo answers simply and returns his attention to the safety handbook. He is already tired of this conversation. However, his disinterest does not diminish the taller boy’s enthusiasm to continue talking to him.

“Oh, then you should definitely check me out!” Chanyeol smirks and tosses Kyungsoo a greasy wink. Clicking his tongue, he winks a couple more times and also sends a set of love shots.

Slowly, Kyungsoo raises his head again and frowns at the shameless boy in front of him, speechless. That pick-up line was so bad he doesn’t even know how to react. Then as he watches the red hair boy continue to wink at him and tries to flirt, keyword being try, Kyungsoo lets out a dry chuckle before quickly walking away without looking back.

They say stupidity is contagious.

Kyungsoo breaks into a run.

\---

“This is the produce area and that’s Jongin over there,” Minseok, the manager of EXO Mart, points to a boy spraying vegetable with a water mister and introduced him. Eyes closed and back slouched, Jongin sways back and forth over the vegetables like a human sprinkler.

“Is he… sleeping?” Kyungsoo asks cautiously. However, his question is ignored and the tour continues.

“Over there is seafood and that’s Yixing behind the counter,” Minseok gestures towards a gentle looking young man who is speaking seriously to a fish. Kyungsoo blinks curiously at the unusual sight then quickly looks away. He really wants to ask why Yixing is talking to a fish but he has a hunch he won't get an answer out of the manager. So he bites his tongue and follows Minseok onward instead.

A tiny bakery comes into view around the corner and there are two teens leaning on either side of the serving counter. Kyungsoo quickly glances them over and he thinks the brunette on the outside looks a lot like a playful pup as he cutely yakked at the boy inside the bakery who grinned in return with a Cheshire Cat smirk. A snippet of their conversation travels into Kyungsoo ears as he and Minseok walk by and almost immediately, the new boy regrets eavesdropping.

“Are you a donut, Dae? Because you look so sweet I just want to eat you hole.”

“Mm, I'm sure you do, Baek. Did you come up with this one or Chanyeol? It's particularly awful.”

“What do you think?”

“I think you're adorable.”

Kyungsoo resists the urge to dry gag and he mentally curses. ’What the hell is wrong with all the people in this place?!’ He silently exclaims and chews on his bottom lip to stop himself from screaming out. He knew something was funny about this place when he was hired three minutes into the interview. However, he is desperate for some extra cash right now and nowhere else will hire him since he has no experience; not even the juice bar down the street. So now, he is stuck being a cashier at a strange and tiny supermarket.

‘Baggers really can’t be juicers, huh.’ The corner of Kyungsoo’s mouth twitches grimly as Chanyeol’s lame joke suddenly echoed in his mind; stupidity really is contagious.

Ignorant of Kyungsoo’s inner turmoil, Minseok casually introduces the two teens they just passed. “That's the bakery over there. The one being sexually harassed is Jongdae, he’s our apprentice baker,” the manager explains and keeps up his pace, “and the one doing the harassment is Baekhyun. He’s the other cashier aside from you. He's not as bad as he appears to be, him and Chanyeol both.”

“Park Chanyeol?” Kyungsoo’s brows furrow together, unimpressed, and he scoffs. He doesn't have a great impression of the red hair teen, partially because of the other’s exceptional height, but mostly because it’s only his second day and the said teen has already tried to hit on him. Again, key word being tried. If Chanyeol was even just a bit suave and slightly more charming in a less oafish way, Kyungsoo might have taken up on his flirting. He does find the taller boy to be quite attractive, face wise that is, but Kyungsoo cannot help but cringe whenever Chanyeol opened his mouth. Suave is not Chanyeol’s thing; this has become very apparent to Kyungsoo despite having just met the other teen. Maybe charming or cute, but definitely not suave.

“Ah, speak of the devil,” Minseok interrupts Kyungsoo’s thought and points at the two human bean poles just up ahead, “there’s Chanyeol now. He works in the deli. The boy next to him is Sehun, he’s our shelf boy. If you need a price check on something, you page for him.”

Kyungsoo nods and while ignoring Chanyeol’s eager greeting, he sizes up Sehun who is also openly looking him over from head to toe. The slender boy is almost the same height as Chanyeol but his face is still childish. Coyly, he bows at Minseok and says a quiet hello towards the newcomer. Kyungsoo smiles a little at Sehun’s shyness and he decides that he doesn’t mind this boy because he seems normal.

“Hey Kyungsoo, you remember me right? I’m Chanyeol!” the red hair giant clamors noisily and leans over the deli display, his lanky arms hanging and swinging in front of the glass. Kyungsoo blinks blankly at him and replies in disdain.

“Unfortunately.”

“Awesome!” Chanyeol replies with a toothy grin, not affected by Kyungsoo’s tone at all. Then turning towards Sehun, he whispers and tries to be discreet, “this is the new guy I was talking about.”

“You were talking about me?” Kyungsoo narrows his eyes as he caught wind of the other boy’s words, “Why were you talking about me?” He doesn't like to be talked about.

“He said he _like_ likes you,” Sehun answers coolly and avoids Chanyeol’s flailing arms with practiced precision. “I’m very sorry that Chanyeol hyung likes you,” Sehun steps up to Kyungsoo and places a sympathetic hand on the latter’s shoulder. Then pulling out a wheel of cheese covered in red wax from his back, he drops it in Kyungsoo’s palms. Solemnly, Sehun says: “Gouda luck.”

Rendered speechless again by a pun, Kyungsoo’s face darkens gradually as Chanyeol’s hearty laugh pours into his ears. He takes back his initial opinion of Sehun; this boy is far from normal. Nobody in this shop is normal!

Glancing back and forth at the three boys, one about to die from laughter, one smirking proudly, and one staring soullessly at a wheel of cheese, Minseok flashes them all a genuine, happy smile.

“I’m so glad you’re all getting along so well!”

\---

Two months later, Kyungsoo is still at EXO Mart. As the digital clock on the cash register displays 12:30 P.M., the wide-eyes boy clocks out for his lunch break and strolls into the tiny supermarket. Despite his better judgment, Kyungsoo still took up the position of cashier at EXO Mart. He was going to quit but Junmyeon convinced him otherwise in a rather unconventional manner.

The desperate glint in the owner’s eyes when Kyungsoo said he wanted to quit still haunts the teen in his dreams sometimes. There was just so much unsaid grievance in that intense gaze, like a grudging spirit, and Kyungsoo was actually afraid he might be haunted by a person who is still alive if he quit from EXO Mart. However, his fear was soon replaced by annoyance when he found out that all of it was just an act from the crafty owner.

‘‘Ah, that look,” Minseok said casually a week later without even bothering to lift his eyes from organizing the store display at the front of the supermarket, “Junmyeon uses it on the boys in the back all the time. That seems to be the only way to tame them, through guilt. I guess that works on you too.”

Kyungsoo scowled and twiddled with his fingers in pettish resentment. He wanted to rebut that it wasn’t guilt but fear which made him change his mind. But that sounded seriously uncool so he kept his mouth shut. He didn’t want to be lumped together with the rest of the nitwits in this place back then, especially with that silly red hair giant.

However, despite Kyungsoo’s negative first impression of the boys at EXO Mart, they have charmed him and now he is quite fond of them. It really is scary how quickly humans can adapt to a new environment and become a part of the community.

Strolling through the produce area, Kyungsoo taps Jongin on his back and makes sure the sleepy boy is not drowning the beets again. Then swinging by the seafood corner he waves hello to Yixing and his fresh octopus display. Overhead, Baekhyun hollers for a price check yet again in an overly sweet voice and Kyungsoo catches Sehun rolling his eyes by the non-perishable aisle. Muttering something unsightly under his breath, the youngest employee stomps towards the cash register while clicking his price scanner like clicking the trigger of a toy gun. This has been the fourth time Baekhyun called for a price check in the past hour and a half.

“Did something happen between Baekhyun and Sehun?” Kyungsoo asks Jongdae as he approaches the bakery.

The apprentice baker grins mischievously as always and shakes his head. “Baek just enjoys annoying Sehun,” he chuckles and hands Kyungsoo a hot dog bun, “it’s his way of showing love. You'd know.”

Kyungsoo scrunches his nose and takes the bread. “Too well...” he mumbles and tosses Jongdae a chocolate bar he swiped from the front as payment for the bun. He used to be a beneficiary of Baekhyun’s love, and still is from time to time, but recently the playful teen is keener on showering Sehun with his unique form of affection. Bidding his friend a quick goodbye as Jongdae is being summoned by the old baker in the back, Kyungsoo makes his way to the final destination of his lunch.

The deli comes into his view as well as a familiar head of messy red hair. The corners of Kyungsoo’s plump lips curve upwards subconsciously as he sneaks up to the counter and leans casually against the glass display. For once, Chanyeol is actually working diligently on the slicer, sliding a large chunk of ham back and forth against the smooth surface of the sharp machine.

Over the past two months, the lanky teen has put Kyungsoo through food pun hell and back with the help the Baekhyun and Sehun. Jongdae would occasionally partake in what the other three have called the ‘welcome initiation to EXO Mart’ but he was not nearly as bad. From cute puns worthy to be put on valentine cards to horrible puns that can even make the dead cringe, Kyungsoo has heard them all. Finally after a month of torture, he has had enough. So in the true fashion of the terrible threes (aka. Chanyeol, Baekhyun and Sehun), he told them off: “If you don’t want a pizza of me then you butter back off or else I will split you like a pair of chopsticks so beet it!”

And it worked like a charm. Impressed with the result of their constant pestering, nah, welcoming, the troublemakers stopped bombarding the newcomer with their antics. As Chanyeol fake cried and ran off hugging a bag of soggy beets, Sehun and Baekhyun each gave Kyungsoo a sympathetic pat on his back. “That’s the person who likes you,” they said while shaking their heads and grinning like a pair of crowing hooligans, “Gouda luck, Kyungsoo-shi.”

Since then, nothing much has changed in Kyungsoo’s life except that Chanyeol has steadily grown on him like mold on bread. Maybe it’s the taller boy’s infallible natural charm, or the way the corner of his eyes crinkles when he laughs, or perhaps it's the way his face lights up whenever their eyes meet, but Chanyeol is barging into Kyungsoo’s life, heart, and mind without much resistance from the latter. Such as now, Kyungsoo takes a moment and lets his lukewarm gaze glide over the lanky boy’s broad shoulders, down his slightly bent back, and pass bowed legs that can never seem to stand still for more than a minute. An ambiguous warm feeling pools in Kyungsoo’s lower abdomen and he swallows hard, his throat suddenly feeling dry and smoky. How he used to dislike the taller boy for his exceptional height and excellent physique out of jealousy; he still dislikes those aspects of Chanyeol but now for an entirely different reason.

Now? Now Chanyeol makes Kyungsoo feel funny. Not the ‘haha-you’re-so-hilarious’ kind of funny but the ‘touch-my-tra-la-la-and-mm-my-ding-ding-dong’ kind of funny. He makes the wide-eyed boy want to run away whenever their gaze locks and say stupid things that don't make sense. When Kyungsoo is around Chanyeol, he thinks in a different way, act in a different way, and feels like someone who doesn’t need to hide anymore. He can be as silly, as stupid, and as dorky as he wants without the fear of being judged because he knows no matter what, Chanyeol will accept him and always be there to be silly, or stupid, or mega dorky with him.

No one knows this yet but Chanyeol makes Kyungsoo feel free; sexy, free, and ready to bingo.

Eyes slowly squinting in mischief, Kyungsoo hollers at the red hair teen: “Yo Park, put a sausage between my buns.”

Chanyeol jumps a little in surprise and his fingers slip from their hold on the ham. Cursing loudly as the chunk of meat tumbles off the slicer and falls onto the floor, the frazzled teen’s lanky arms flail about in the air like branches caught in a storm. The tip of his elfish ears instantly turns deep red as he swings around to face Kyungsoo who is cackling at his clumsiness. Eyes round and mouth agape, Chanyeol’s cheeks flushed rosy as he tries to calm his hitched breathing.

It really wasn’t that long ago when Kyungsoo was the one being teased by his cheesy and suggestive puns, but now the table has turned. Recently, the shorter teen is coming on strong and Chanyeol is becoming weaker against the other’s offenses. He knows it's because he likes the wide-eyed boy and that’s why he is so badly affected. Of course, he will stick his sausage in Kyungsoo’s bun! He’d do that any day of the week even without being asked to.   

Clearing his throat, Chanyeol chuckles awkwardly and picks up the ham by his feet. Cheeks still flushed and breathing erratic, he scampers up to the display with the lump of pig meat in his arms. Bearing two rows of pearly whites, he grins: “Nice buns,” he nods at the bread then at Kyungsoo’s butt and winks. The latter simply blinks at him, unbothered by his greasiness, and tosses the hot dog bun at him.

“I want the German sausage.”

“Not the Chanyeol sausage?”

For full three seconds, Kyungsoo stared, amazed, at the other boy who fumbled to balance bread on top of a leg of ham in his arms. He is always astonished at Chanyeol’s audacity to spew nonsense no matter the time or place. However Kyungsoo quickly recovers his calm and replies in nonchalant: “Not now, but maybe later.” He smiles sweetly and his plump lips form into a perfect heart shape.

Chanyeol’s heart skips a beat and a numbing tingle rushes through his stiff body. Stupefied by Kyungsoo’s rare forwardness, the taller boy stutters in reply and his stingy arms jitter in a frenzy. Then with a dull thud, a howl, and a string of colourful words flying out of his loud mouth, Chanyeol is bouncing around behind the deli counter with a hot dog bun in one hand and his bruised toe in the other. On the floor, the poor ham rolled away from the cursing deli boy in silence.

Bursting into a fit of hysterical giggles at the silly scene in front of him, Kyungsoo doubles over and stomps his feet. He loves this new found power he has over Chanyeol, as well as the bubbling feelings brewing in the pit of his stomach from knowing that the other boy becomes all flustered because of him. Maybe one day he will act on those feelings and put an end to Chanyeol’s misery. Or not, Kyungsoo continues to giggle gleefully and runs away. He will think more about it later. For now, he will just enjoy this moment of happiness courtesy of Chanyeol’s misfortune.

A few aisles down, Minseok looks away from the deli and he shakes his head. Those two are flirting again during their shifts. Don’t they know it’s against store policy? They are getting just as bad as or maybe even worse than Baekhyun and Jongdae. Sighing quietly, Minseok turns to Sehun who has just returned from the front cash and places a concerned hand on the younger boy’s shoulder.

“Please grow up to be a decent adult, Sehunnie. You’re my last hope.”

Then sighing again, Minseok leaves behind an extremely confused shelf boy and goes to check on Jongin. He cannot listen to Junmyeon rant about another expensive water bill anymore. Truly, Minseok thinks it’s a miracle that EXO Mart has remained open for this long.

\---

Kyungsoo blinks at the metallic ceiling and heaves a shaky exhale. Right now, his mind should be blank or filled with the dirty deed ongoing in between his legs. Yet he cannot help but wonder for a brief moment about how EXO Mart has managed to stay open up until this point in this dog eat dog world. Is it that easy to operate a supermarket? Just as easily as how two employees of that said supermarket can mess around inside a hidden corner of the back freezer without anyone noticing?

It is 2:30 P.M. on a Wednesday and the store is dead like any other mid-week afternoon. Kyungsoo lets out another trembling breath as a shiver of pleasure coursed up his spine. He is still slightly confused at how he ended up pantsless inside the deli freezer with Chanyeol licking his dick.

Just minutes ago, Kyungsoo was passing by the deli during his break when suddenly, Chanyeol dragged him behind the display counter and ducked them both out of sight. With his bum on the floor and his back leaning against the display, Kyungsoo gawked in surprise at the taller boy who pressed his body hotly against him. Merely inches away, Chanyeol’s hot breath tickled the shorter boy’s heated skin as both boys stared at each other without a word. Kyungsoo could hear his heart pounding wildly in his chest and he swore he also heard Chanyeol’s. They’ve never been this close before, but he also wouldn’t mind it if there were even closer.

Then suddenly, Chanyeol whispers in a husky voice: “Did you mean it yesterday when you asked me to put a sausage in your buns? Because I’ll do it. I’ll do it right now.”

‘Ah, that’s how,’ Kyungsoo remembers and he bites back a moan. Sensually, he digs his fingers deeper into Chanyeol’s messy red hair and gives the tresses a sharp tug. From the deli to the freezer, everything happened in a whirlwind of passion. Wet lips, hot bodies, searching fingers and wandering hands; raging hormones took over the two teen’s minds and instigated their daring moves. Hidden from view by a stack of cardboard boxes, a display of primal instinct for lust and love is taking place.

Kyungsoo nearly chokes when he feels Chanyeol swallow him whole in one go. Shoots of pleasurable shivers course down his back as the taller boy’s tongue skillfully traces his length. Teasing the head playfully, Chanyeol grazes over the shorter boy’s most sensitive skin with his teeth. Kyungsoo’s entire body jerks forward from the slight nibble and his head lolls back in ecstasy. Something incoherent escapes his mouth in raspy whispers and he unconsciously thrusts his hips forward. His body is desperately craving for more.

The corners of Chanyeol’s lips curve upwards as he feels the other boy shudder from his every lick and touch, and shamelessly, he sucks harder at the pulsing member in his mouth. One of his large hands caresses upward and roams over Kyungsoo’s smooth abdominal, while his other hand slithers behind and grabs hold of the fleshy behind. Feeling his fingers sink into one of the shorter boy’s soft yet firm butt cheeks, Chanyeol lets out a throaty growl and tightens his grip. He can feel his pants getting uncomfortably tight so he distracts himself from the discomfort by sucking Kyungsoo deeper into his mouth. Reveling in the broken gasp from the shorter boy’s mouth as he speeds up his pumping, Chanyeol steadies himself and grips onto either side of Kyungsoo’s hips.

Forward and backward and forward again, the tip of Kyungsoo’s cock crashes clumsily into Chanyeol’s throat and uvula. His gag reflex is about to kick in when he hears the rawest moan from Kyungsoo yet, so Chanyeol squeezes his thumb in his palm and gives a few more vigorous pumps. Seconds later, Kyungsoo releases in his mouth and the shorter boy’s distinct scent overwhelms his senses. Chanyeol shuts his eyes as he tightens the squeeze on his thumb and he lets the other boy rock out the rest of his orgasm inside his mouth. Greedily, he swallows every last drop of Kyungsoo’s cum and when he pulls away, he licks his lips playfully.

Coming back to his senses again, Kyungsoo blinks in a daze at the red hair boy still kneeling on the ground. Gradually his face flushes the same shade of red as Chanyeol’s hair and he fidgets uncomfortably in the cold air. As his mouth opens and closes like a fish out water, Kyungsoo tries to find the right words to say. Awkwardly, he tangles his fingers awkwardly from the sweaty strands of the Chanyeol’s hair but his mind is still swimming in ecstasy.

“Um… t-thank you?” Kyungsoo mumbles hesitant and embarrassment hits him out of nowhere all of a sudden. Ducking his head low, Kyungsoo peeks at Chanyeol as the taller boy stands up and wipes the corner of his smirking mouth. He cannot believe he just came in Chanyeol’s mouth. This is the first time he has ever reached climax in front of someone else. Kyungsoo usually doesn't enjoy being physical with people; he couldn’t even imagine letting anyone touch him in such intimate manners before. However, when Chanyeol caressed his length and proceeded to stroke it with his tongue, Kyungsoo wished they could have done this sooner.

“You’re welcome,” Chanyeol chirps and brings Kyungsoo into a bear hug, trying to shield the shorter boy from the cold. He knows he has acted rather brash just now but the wild dreams he had about Kyungsoo from last night has been taunting his sanity since then. It was all because of their suggestive conversation yesterday at lunch. All Chanyeol could think about since morning was how to re-enact this beautiful fantasy of his in real life. So when he got a chance, he took a risk, made a move, and put Kyungsoo’s dick in his mouth; and boy is he glad he did that! He has already anticipated for the worst, which is getting a merciless round kick from the wide-eyed boy and getting fired, but he never imagined he’d get to go this far with Kyungsoo.

Feeling luckier as well as more confident, Chanyeol pulls the other boy’s half-naked body even closer in their hug and he begins to grind his hardened member against Kyungsoo’s softened one. “Now that you’ve felt good, can I feel good too and put my sausage in your buns?” Chanyeol murmurs against the other’s earlobe then nibbles on it. Taken aback and suddenly afraid of what is about to come, Kyungsoo lets out a hiccupping squeak and struggles against the lanky arms trapping him to the spot. He doesn't know much about sex but he knows enough to know what’s what, including how two men copulate.

“I-I don’t think this is a good idea, here, d-doing that,” Kyungsoo stumbles in an escalating panic and desperately tries to swat away the naughty hand now groping and massaging his butt cheeks, “Chanyeol, no. It’s cold, I’m not ready, I-I can’t.”

Nibbling on the nervous boy’s neck softly, one of Chanyeol’s hand glides up Kyungsoo’s smooth back in an effort to calm the frightened teen down. His other hand continues to fondle plump butt cheeks without any shame. “I know, I know. I’m not stupid, Kyungsoo, I don’t want to hurt you,” the red hair giant whispers and locks gaze with the boy in his arms, “So I want to use your thighs.”  

“My thighs?” Kyungsoo frowns a little and Chanyeol nods eagerly, his eyes gleaming with anticipation. The taller teen has only told Sehun this, who didn’t want to know at all, but he loves Kyungsoo’s fleshy thighs. The shorter teen doesn’t wear shorts often but the few times he did in the past months, Chanyeol always couldn’t pull his eyes away from those lean yet tender looking legs. Every time he sees Kyungsoo bend over from behind, perky bottom high up in the air and perfectly proportioned legs squeezed tight and straight, Chanyeol feels a fire starting in his pants. And now a chance to defile those thighs of his dreams; just thinking about it is making Chanyeol even harder.

Feeling the red hair teen’s bulging member twitch impatiently against his abdomen, Kyungsoo blushes darker. Finally, he nods timidly and gives the other teen consent. Chanyeol cheers like a child and wasting no time at all, he drops his pants in a flash and swings Kyungsoo around. Chest to back and skin on skin, Chanyeol inhales deeply and let Kyungsoo’s scent intoxicates him. Zealously, he glides the tip of his burning cock down from Kyungsoo’s tailbone, pass the butt cheeks now reddened with finger marks, and crams his hardened length in between meaty thighs. Melting in a new world of pleasure, Chanyeol moans loudly and heaves a satisfied sigh. He takes a moment to relishes the warm flesh clenched around his cock before beginning to slide in and out in at a slow speed.

Kyungsoo bites into his bottom lip as he gets used to the strange yet arousing sensation between his legs. Despite the cool temperature in the freezer, a thin layer of perspiration forms on his skin and it mixes with Chanyeol’s precum, creating a raw lubricate that allows for smoother and less inhibited movements. As the lanky teen thrusts harder and faster, his breathing becoming more labored and in sync with Kyungsoo’s quiet panting. Soon both teens are on the verge of euphoria and they are ready to burst at any moment. Mumbling sweet nothings in Kyungsoo’s ears, Chanyeol ropes the other boy’s quivering body closer against his own and his hand erratically pumps the shorter teen’s erected cock. In that instance, they forgot where they are and just indulged in the carnal gratification only they could bring to the other. Then with a few final violent thrust of his hip, Chanyeol releases himself in between reddened flesh and Kyungsoo quickly follows.

Slowly, streaks of sticky white fluid drip down flushed inner thighs and leaves behind lewd marks that evince fleeting moments of passion. Drops of cum splatter across the floor and soon solidifies into milky dots in the cold air. Both Chanyeol and Kyungsoo gasps hastily for air as their tired bodies fold against each other. Chest and back still pressed together as if glued tight, Chanyeol props an arm against a wall to keep them both upstraight. For a short while, neither of them speaks and both teens savor the lingering high. Finally, Kyungsoo is the first to peel their sticky bodies apart and he turns around to face Chanyeol.

“We really shouldn’t have done that here…” Kyungsoo mumbles and pulls his pants up. His cheeks still rosy from the intense exercise just now.

Chanyeol grins at him like the idiot in love that he is and replies in mirth. “Too late for that,” he shrugs and also gathers his pants. Pulling out his phone, Chanyeol checks the time and curses quietly. Kyungsoo glances over then immediately glares at the taller boy.

“Fuck, I’m late!”

By the cash register, Baekhyun bats his lashes innocently at Junmyeon who is scowling in annoyance. “I don’t know where Kyungsoo has gone off to for his break or why he’s still not back yet,” the teenager says in nonchalant with an adorable smile, “but even if I do, I won’t tell you because I am not a tattletale.”

Junmyeon growls at the cute boy who is now sticking a tongue out at him and the owner stomps off towards the deli at the back. He doesn’t know why but he has a hunch that Chanyeol is responsible for his new cashier’s tardiness.

It usually is Chanyeol’s fault, as the past has demonstrated in EXO Mart. Yep, Junmyeon nods to himself, it must be Chanyeol’s fault.

\---

It is 11:00 P.M. on the same Wednesday and EXO Mart has closed for the day. Sensing somebody approaching his way, Kyungsoo looks up from organizing the receipts and finds Chanyeol standing on the other side of the conveyor belt with a basket full of groceries. Automatically, he glares at the taller teen who grins in return apologetically with a shy toothy smile.

Because of Chanyeol, Kyungsoo was lectured by Junmyeon then by Minseok then by Junmyeon again on the importance of being punctual. He would have made Chanyeol get grilled with him but Junmyeon’s constant questions made him think that the owner already suspected their little rendezvous in the back freezer. For some reason, Junmyeon won’t stop asking Kyungsoo if he was late because of Chanyeol. Guilty and conscientious because his tastiness indeed has everything to do with the red hair boy, Kyungsoo denied the owner’s suggestion and took all of the blame. He usually isn’t a petty person to hold a grudge but the lectures he had to suffer through was just a smidget too much for him to handle with good grace. So now, Kyungsoo is mad at Chanyeol and he isn’t quite ready to forgive yet.

Plus, the skins by his inner thigh are still sore and raw, and the uncomfortableness added to his anger.  

Not bothered by Kyungsoo’s coldness at all, Chanyeol shuffles closer and whisper cheerfully: “You know, it was actually quite hard cleaning up afterwards. Some of it froze to the floor and I had to scrape it off,” he grins wider as he notices the blush growing on Kyungsoo’s cheeks, “I wonder if it’s your or mine.”

Glaring even harder because of Chanyeol’s evocative words, Kyungsoo throws a pen at the smiling face waving in front of him. Chanyeol bursts out laughing and dodges the flying pen with ease; the tips of his elfish ears also blushed bright red from recalling the heated events in the afternoon. Then looking around warily, he fidgets with the basket handle in his hands and lowers his voice again, this time sounding a little more nervous and hesitant.

“I have something I want to tell you. Will you listen to what I have to say?”

“What,” Kyungsoo snaps but his voice is void of malice. Taking in the other boy’s reluctance and shyness, which is very unusual, and Kyungsoo softens a little. Gradually, the little anger he had felt towards the red hair giant melts away under Chanyeol’s puppy eyes, and he sighs in defeat. “Fine, I’ll listen,” Kyungsoo gives in and the other boy brightens up instantly. Seeing Chanyeol smiling happily again as per usual, Kyungsoo could not help but smile as well in fondness.

“Yay!” the lanky boy cheers and begin to fumble with the contents inside his grocery basket, “I didn’t get to say this earlier because you ran off being late and all... so I thought I’d say this now.” Looking around one more time as if embarrassed of being seen for what he is about to do, Chanyeol starts speaking the words he has been practicing all evening.

“Um well, Kyungsoo, as you may already know, I really like you,” he says and pulls out a loaf of bread from the basket. Slowly, pushes the bread towards the other boy while blushing beet red. “And even though we’ve only known each other for a short amount of time, I think I may even lo-loaf (love) you.”

One of Kyungsoo’s eyelid begins to twitch because of the corny pun, but uncontrollably, the corners of his mouth are also twitching and curving upward towards the sky. Oblivious and also too nervous to look Kyungsoo in the eyes, Chanyeol continues his love confession and pulls out more food from his shopping basket.

“I-I think we make a great pair,” a large Asian pear appears on the conveyor belt, “and I am nuts about you,” then a bag of salted peanuts. Pausing for a moment as he searches inside the basket, Chanyeol chuckles nervously and lays out more food.

“You are the apple of my eye, you have taken over a pizza of my heart, and I like you butter than anyone else I’ve ever met in my life!”

A red apple, a box of frozen pizza, and a stick of butter joins the pear, the nuts, and the brick of bread on the conveyor belt.

“So… so…” Chanyeol stutters and finally gathering enough courage to lock gaze with Kyungsoo, he drops an extra-large package of bacon in front of the cashier: “Please don’t go bacon my heart and be my boyfriend??”

Glancing back and forth between the pile of food and Chanyeol, whose face is as red as a tomato, a contented smile slowly blooms on Kyungsoo’s face and he breaks into a hearty laugh. He cannot believe how dorky and adorable Chanyeol is being right now; up to him to come up with such a bizarre way to confess! But knowing that the lanky boy has thought of all of these puns with just him in mind, Kyungsoo’s smile grows bigger and his heart bloat up from an overload of happiness.

Then as he regains his composure, his cheeks now rosy and glowing with bliss, Kyungsoo gently pushes the loaf of bread back to Chanyeol and answers the nervous giant.

“Okay, I’ll be your boyfriend.”

It took a moment for Kyungsoo’s answer to register in Chanyeol’s mind and as the other’s words sank in, the ecstatic giant hopped around in his spot like an excited rabbit. Overjoyed, he tries to hug his new boyfriend from across the conveyor belt before realizing how silly he is being and circles around in large, hurried steps. When they are finally standing face to face, Chanyeol wraps his lanky arms tightly around Kyungsoo like a giant koala bear. No longer caring if anyone will see them being too intimate while still working, he nuzzles his cheek against his boyfriend’s soft hair and sighs happily. Kyungsoo struggled to free himself at first, but soon gives up and just enjoys the loving embrace. However, the comfortable and sweet silence between them is quickly broken by Chanyeol’s question.  

“Soooooooo, since I don’t have any raisin to offer you, how about a date?”

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes and punches his punny boyfriend on his back.

“Don’t ruin the moment.”

“Okay, so you don’t want to taco-about it right now, I get it.”

“...”

“No big dill.”

“... I really don’t ap-peach-iate this...”

“Ohhh good one, Kyungsoo!” Chanyeol cheers loudly and smacks a wet kiss on his boyfriend’s forehead.

They say stupidity is contagious.

Kyungsoo smirks and buries himself deeper into Chanyeol’s hug. Oh well, they can just be a pear of fools together then!

 

**FIN.**

 

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: horrible puns flying left and right, and awkward thigh fuck for life.
> 
> This is my TakoStation 2016 submission and hell, it is an abomination. I am quite late at uploading it here and maybe some of you have already read it through the fest... I apologize to anyone who dares to read this for subjecting you to such nonsense and utter ridiculousness. You’ve been warned. AND I’VE TRIED, OKAY?? I’VE REALLY TRIED OTL
> 
> Also for those of you who are unfamiliar with the TakoStation fest, please check out their livejournal and indulge in lots of wonderful chansoo stories: http://takostation.livejournal.com/
> 
> Oh and for those of you who do not get the ‘touch-my-tra-la-la-and-mm-my-ding-ding-dong’ reference, here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z13qnzUQwuI (This actually makes a very good ending song to this fic...LOL)


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